That's why you shouldn't.

This is probably redundant. I know I have posted this kind of writing as part of other posts before. But nonetheless, this should be written.

I am truly surrounded by wonderful people. They're lovely. They are so nice and kind and think so nicely of me, I'm scared.

I'm scared of how they are nice. Why they are nice and kind. They speak to me nicely. And listen to me. And talk to me. And smile at me. Sometimes they hug me too. What is it that I do to deserve this fortune? Is it because what I do? What did I do? Would they still be kind if I don't do so anymore? Will I meet people like them in the future? They are so nice and kind and it's like almost too good to be true--it's scary.

I'm scared of everything nice they think of me. As much as I'm flattered, I'm scared. Is it because I'm not my true self when I converse or interact with them, or is it because I just don't really understand myself? Am I really that worthy? Am I really that good? Is it really me that you're seeing? Or is it really me that have always been oblivious of what I am?

(You know, like one time when you think you said "A" and people around you heard that you said "B";  I can never figure out if they misheard or if I really said different things than what I intended.)

How could I not be happy.
How could I not be thankful.

How could I betray all these grace laid upon me.
(And they are just people; to think of tasty stuff I ate, exciting stories I read, magnificent ideas I encountered, fun things I did...)

Being sad or depressed, even for a minute, seems like a really spoiled act now isn't it?