"Million-to-one chances crop up nine times out of ten."
Let see.
Dream, thank you. I finally found you. Ole Kirk Christiansen, thank you. Thanks to your incredible invention, you made me realize this the first time ever after all this years. The beauty of toys. Aliekha Tierandha Putri, thank you. If you didn't bring that newspaper, I probably stuck with things I don't even like that much in the first place. Thank you, my special friends that helped me, encouraged me to find it. Thank you mama and papa for listening to my childish-idiotic-SillyRabbitIdealismIsForKids thoughts, even though you probably didn't get what the heck I was saying, even though you thought there are bigger and better things I can do, and still encouraged me for it. Said things that warmed up my heart, my tiny heart that knows nothing. A heart full of hope and excitement. Like never before.
For a moment there there's a doubt in me that says, "What if it's just temporary illusion?" "What if it's just an ego, stupid-stupid-goodfornothing-temporary ego, just like every other labile teenager in whole universe experienced?" and whatnot.
I'll say, I don't care.
I've been in doubt for a long time and I-don't-know-when I forgot the excitement, but my body still remembers. And I want to make sure that I remember too.
For all I know, no matter how wild my dreams were (while sleeping) I'd never believe such things as.. that. I'm sceptic. I slapped away idealism with things that I called cynic reality, even when I truly want that so-called idealism to be real. I’m suppose to be 16! The age when people believe that world was made of sweets and rainbows! (or at least that's what I believe) Heck, I don’t even believe that when I’m 10 or younger. Let alone now.
So why now? What made me changed my mind? What made me believe?
I don’t know.
Huh? Yeah, seriously. I don’t know. It just strucks me like Pikachu’s Thunderbolt in the middle of windy day. But whatever it is, I'm glad. Because I was content without this dream, and now I feel awesome. Just by dreaming. Imagine what would I feel if it comes true.
I don't really care about how the life goes, I'm just there to play my part. And that's enough. I'm happy. I don't know, nor care, about what kind of future lies in front of my eyes, unseen. This is the dream that I wanted. The dream that surpasses my consciousness that a rani won't live forever. That's enough for now. What I need to do is do my best. Wow. I still can't believe that I just typed that.
Talent? No I don't have any. But that just means that I have to work harder, nothing else. I have a lifetime to make up for that.
I will survive. This post will be my witness. As well as you guys who read it.
"You're sure to do impossible things
If you follow your heart
Your dreams will fly on magical wings
When you follow your heart
—"Follow Your Heart," Thumbelina
p.s. My old self would probably snorted and shrugged it off.
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